2015 is the next changing of the guard, so let’s vote in the right people. Go green, fellow human beings! The planet reels in the face of humanity’s rapacious appetite for its bounty! The looting of mother nature by the evil forces of capitalism will beggar the planet and so beggar us all. We must heed those who would turn us away from the self-destructive path of corporate avarice and wicked profiteering bankers. Those people have formed a party, and they wish only that we heed their call in the coming televised political debates in the run-up to this spring’s election to the UK parliament.

Natalie Bennett was on the Sunday Politics yesterday declaring the Greens’ intent to introduce a ‘universal basic income’ which at once sounded eerily familiar. I was intrigued, and couldn’t help but delve into my memories of reading Milton Friedman, and realised it basically means a negative income tax. So the Greens are in favour of a minimal admin welfare offering. Most intriguing. Certainly that is the opposite of what most welfare cheerleaders like to implement, as they make the admin around welfare bigger and bigger decade by decade.

Furthermore, the party itself is big on ‘nonviolence’ and ‘democratic participation’ according to the encyclopaedia to end all encyclopaedias, and this means not punishing people for what they think or what they believe. In effect being a member of Al-Qaeda would no longer be a crime. That is actually very libertarian. What’s more, a Green government would scrap Trident, leave NATO, and permit a referendum on continued membership of the European Union.

Too good to be true? Where could the catch possibly come? Hopefully the tirade at the outset of this piece makes it clear what the UK Greens are all about, plain old eco-socialism. This means, in short, that they are pro free movement of people but anti free trade. This reminds the philosopher sage of putting ‘nonviolence’ next to ‘democratic participation’ in the description of the party platform. That’s the Wiki article writer’s sin, not the Green Party website’s managers’. Voting is invariably and verifiably violence after all. So, raging hypocrisy? It seems so.

Eco-socalism is a new socialism of deliberate poverty that lets go of quaint notions like improving the lot of humanity, which was what gave the early reform and revolutionary socialists their animus to keep on with their grands projets. Instead, eco-socialism is all about stripping away pointless fripperies like power grids and those pesky energy-guzzling home appliances in favour of a simpler, more eco-friendly lifestyle. Why the ‘socialism’ in the name? Because the Green Party of this fair isle is full of disappointed former Labour supporters who want the government to do more.

That negative income tax is the start, but greatly enlarged funding for government social safety nets at the expense of higher taxes on the rich and presumably a lot more inflation are the biggest, meanest tools at their disposal. So presumably they’d introduce heavy taxes on energy use above certain levels per person at some point. Taxing and spending is a perennial favourite, and with the military reduced to a small gendarmerie one could expect funding of state pensions, and kickbacks to union members to increase dramatically as well.

The aforementioned Natalie Bennett, currently the head of the Green Party, loves Thomas Piketty’s Capital in the 21st Century, which would be an impressive coup but for the fact that Bob Murphy and Phil Magness already debunked the entire book. In fact their paper has recently ben the most downloaded on that entire website. It’s getting very boring to have to keep repeating the same points about economic calculation and imperfect knowledge and government officials being only human too, but it seems the point hasn’t gotten through yet.

There is also, of course, the tiny problem of socialism’s ecological record, wherein the Soviet Union and China offer truly horrifying lessons in how to really corrupt and destroy a biome in ways us evil capitalists could only dream of. This is why the eco-socialism of today just despairs of any industrial development or division of labour at all and suggests turning the clock back. So it looks like this writer won’t vote Green. They appear to be the most libertarian of the current parties, but that’s little more than damning with faint praise  since they’d gleefully return the country to the 70’s but with the living standards of the 30’s.

Just as well the won’t win in May, then!